


The Demon That Lies Within

by Cyanide_Surprise (Queen_Oreo), LeaStone, UltimateGamer101



Series: A Soul as Bright as the Stars [2]
Category: Underfell - Fandom, Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: AU of Original, Alternate Universe - Underfell, Angst, Bestie Undyne, Child Abuse, Dadster, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Female Chara (Undertale), Female Frisk, Fluff, M/M, Memes, Minor Character Death, Multi, POV First Person, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Undertale Pacifist Route - "I want to stay with you.", Protective Sans, Rivalry, Selectively mute, Shipping, Song Lyrics, Tsundere Sans, Underage Rape/Non-con, Violence, You'll hate pretty much everyone, the authors regret nothing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2018-05-09
Packaged: 2018-12-06 17:46:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11605710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queen_Oreo/pseuds/Cyanide_Surprise, https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeaStone/pseuds/LeaStone, https://archiveofourown.org/users/UltimateGamer101/pseuds/UltimateGamer101
Summary: (Underfell adaption of God Soul)She was lost in the dark...The only figures around were dark and corrupted...Then one day light pierced the darkness.The one creatures that were supposed to be created from darknessWere the one's that shined brightest in her life...





	1. The Lost get Found

**Author's Note:**

> Hmm should I make my Underfell chapters their own fic?  
> "the fuck should I care!"  
> You know what Sansy! For this fic I'm joining my other true love!  
> *Universe hops*  
> Honey~  
> "oh hey cyanide. get tired of underfell?"  
> Sans was being mean so I decided too spend time with my real love.  
> "who? blue?"  
> No you silly!  
> "that's cool- wait what?"  
> Oh don't worry! Lea and UG101 will bring their favorites here too! ^^

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Song -  
> The Lost Get Found - Britt Nicole  
> (Ironically)

I struggled against the tight chains.

Someone new was upstairs.

I could tell because he's been talking to them for about twenty minutes.

He always had to brief the newbies

I thought about screaming. Would it even be of any use? Not really… I’ve known for quite a while that I was in a soundproof room.

Alone…

It was all just wishful thinking.

All screaming would do was get him to take out the whip again…

Not like I’d give him any reaction.

He was always talking about how beautiful my hair was… how it made me look so mature… How I reminded him of a princess

I wanted to burn it all of…

If I was good he promised to give me extra food rations or treat me extra ‘special’ when it was his turn to have away at me.

Of course I caused as many problems as possible.

He lost a couple of clients due to my behavior and of course I got punished for it, but somehow the man always forgave me…

That fucker.

I was no one's princess. And he fucking knew it.

What a fucking joke.

I had nothing to do… nothing to  say… so I just sat there counting the hours until he brought down his next ‘client’.

I hated it all.

When I first got down here he tried to be friendly with me… to play cards with me. I may have been only twelve, but I wasn’t a dumbass. I knew what I was there for and I knew that I sure as hell wasn’t playing Old Maid with the man who was selling my body like I was some kind of sex toy.

I heard the sound of footsteps upstairs and could only guess that a new client arrived. Though with all the yelling they must have wanted to pay less than he was willing to go for. I listened to the exchange with very mild curiosity as I knew either way I going to have to do something for the sick bastard.

After a few minutes of yelling I heard a loud

**Thunk!**

And suddenly a bunch more footsteps.

_What the hell?_

The door to the basement opened slowly and a bunch of whispers broke out.

_A Group?_

He never used to let more than two people at a time come down here . What was going on?

Suddenly the whispering stopped and only one set of footsteps were coming down the stairs.

**Thunk!**

**Thunk!**

**Thunk!**

Finally the footsteps stopped and someone came into view.

It was…

A monster?

I was face to face with a blue, female fish monster in a police uniform

_Well this is new. A roleplayer AND a monster…_

It was my first time I ever saw a monster in person...

I wondered if all monsters looked like that, but honestly if that were true they would be called something like fish people not monsters.

While I got lost in my thoughts the monster looked around the basement area until her eyes landed on me.

I did an eternal sigh as I hung my head low and waited for her to start whatever she wanted.

Moments passed without any movement so when nothing happened I lifted my head up curiously.

She seemed to be seething with anger.

For the first time in years I was scared.

_Did I do something wrong?_

She stared for what seemed like ages before materializing a red spear in her hand.

_Is she gonna kill me? Is she gonna use that on me?! Oh my god! What’s happening?!_

She sung the spear down fast as I looked away waited for my demise.

_I guess it’s been a long time due._

**_Clank Clank_ **

I opened my eyes and saw something I’d never see.

My chains were on the floor.

She had… cut them off.

I wanted to say something…

To thank her…

To jump for joy!

But I was too weak.

All I could do once my chains were cut was sink to the ground unceremoniously.

The fish lady quickly picked me up bridal style and walked to the stairs. Upon approaching the stairs I saw a bunch of other men and women dressed in police uniforms. A couple monsters in the mix as well. One monster stopped her and took off the rest of my chains on my wrist.

She walked us to the front door I’ve only seen once and stared down on me. She turned slightly to get through the door, but what was weird was that she stayed turned until she got to the ambulance. Only when she turned to get me on the gurney did I see why.

The man who had held me captive all those years…

The man I once called my uncle....

The man who had tormented me for most of my life...

Was passed out on the floor bleeding… being put in handcuffs.

I looked at the fish frantically. Was this really happening?

She smiled smugly and reassuringly as she set me down.

She tried to walk away but I held on to her arm.

She looked at me with a hard expression, though it softened when she saw the face I was making.

“You’re safe now. I promise.” She said.

Then the door closed.

* * *

 

I don’t remember falling asleep and that scares me. I also don't remember changing into a hospital gown. Which scares me even more. What I especially don’t remember was washing my hair and body and that TERRIFIES me.

I don’t know where I am or what i’m doing-

Oh…

It all comes back to me.

I was saved…

I was actually rescued from that god forsaken place.

My mouth started twitching in odd ways that made my cheeks hurt.

I quickly stopped the motion though when I heard a knock at the door.

I didn’t bother saying anything since I knew they’d come in anyway and let them open the door for themselves

The door opened to reveal a small yellow dinosaur in a lab coat and the blue fish lady. My eyes widened at the sight of her and I could feel my mouth twitching, this time I don’t give into to it.

The fish seemed surprised I was awake. The fish just seemed happy.

“See! I told you! She’s awake!”

The lizard rolled her eyes.

“I-I really didn’t doubt y-you but sure w-whatever help y-you sleep at night.”

She turns to me and looks at me up and down

“M-malnourished… ” She says and scribbled something down on her notepad. She continues looking at me and scribbling things on her notepad in a way that made me slightly uneasy.

The fish walked over to me with a pen and paper in her hands

“I’m going to need you to answer a few questions.”

I just nod and hold my hand out.

She looks at me for a second before setting the notepad and pen in my hand

“First thing first, Your name.”

‘Shiri Angellum’

“Name of the man who was holding you captive?”

‘Luciel Angellum’

“Your current age”

‘Unknown’

“His current age”

‘Late thirties/early forties’

“How long were you in there”

‘More than ten years’

At the very most I mean

“How did you end up there in the first place?”

Images flashed across my mind.

Me holding on to the car door screaming for my mother.

Her dead eyes just staring at me emotionless as she peeled my fingers off the door.

My being dragged into the house

The first time he…

A hand on my arm pulled me out of my trance.

The sudden physical contact made me screech and put my arms up defensively. I held them  there as they covered my shaking form and kept me away from my attacker.

A growl surprised me and forced me to look up.

The fish lady was glaring at me, her hand positioned slightly above my shoulder.

 _I’m sorry._ I thought but I hadn’t dare said anything.

“What.” she said. “Did he do to you?” I stared up at her confused and saddened.

Finally after a full minute. I spoke.

“Bad things.”

* * *

 

We pulled up to a large cream colored house with a blue door.

“This is where you’ll be staying. This is the home of my deputy and his brother. They’ll be taking care of you.”

I looked at Undyne, as I soon learned was the name of the fish lady, with a pleading face.

 _Don’t leave me here.._ I thought

She put a hand on my head and smiled.

“Don’t worry. They may seem scary but they’re ultimately harmless. They’re tsunderes!”

_Tsun what now?_

She just waved it off and stepped out the car.

“Think of them as pineapples. They’re tough on the outside and sweet on the inside!”

_And acidic_

She knocked on the door.

“You’ll love them! They’re harmless!”

The door swung open to reveal a tall scary looking skeleton in spiky boots and an… apron.

“WHAT DO YOU WANT UNDYNE. IF YOU CAN’T SEE RIGHT NOW I’M BUSY TRYING TO GET READY FOR OUR GUEST.”

The loudness of the skeleton’s voice startled me and I had the strong urge to hide behind Undyne but I didn’t wanna show any weakness.

It was weakness that got me where I was in the first place.

“You idiot! I brought your guest! Don’t you remember the conversation we had on the phone!”

The skeleton thought for a second before responding.

“I HAVE NO RECOLLECTION OF IT BEING TODAY. OH WELL, THIS WILL HAVE TO DO. WHERE IS THAT WORTHLESS HUMAN?”

_“You worthless bitch! Just give up already!”_

**_crack!_ **

_“This whip isn’t gonna get any softer!”_

I cringed inward at the memory. The marks on my body suddenly stinging.

“She’s right here you idiot!”

Undyne pointed towards me and the skeleton looked at me accusingly.

“THIS IS THE HUMAN ME AND BROTHER HAVE TO PROTECT? ARE YOU SURE?”

I looked him straight into his sockets and nodded. I won’t back down. I needed to protect myself.

“WELL DESPITE LOOKING COMPLETELY HELPLESS, I GUESS SHE’S OKAY. SANS! GET DOWN HERE AND GREET OUR NEW HOUSEMATE!”

If the skeleton sounded like he was yelling before, now he sounded like he was screaming. I winced at the noise since I was used to mainly quiet.

“i’m comin’ boss. no need to get ya’ bones in a twist.”

A shorter skeleton walked into the doorway

He was wearing red and black shorts and a hoodie to match. He seemed a lot more laid back than the other one. The only thing that really made him any type of menacing was his gold tooth. I bet he scared a lot of dentists.

When he laid eyes on my he outwardly frowned.

“wha’s this human doin’ here?”

Undyne looked at me.

“Witness Protection, temporary housing, reintegration into society…”

Sans eyed me suspiciously and I did the same refusing to lose my nerve.

“why does she need all that?”

Undyne face palmed.

“Papyrus!”

The skeleton in question gave an offended look.

“DON’T LOOK AT ME. IT'S NOT MY FAULT HE FELL ASLEEP IN THE MIDDLE OF MY EXPLANATION.”

“Well since he obviously doesn't care enough to listen he’ll just have to figure it out later.” Undyne said.

Sans eyed me again.

“why the ‘ell is she wearing your clothes?”

Undyne just glared.

“look i don’t want no homeless human in our house jus’ waitin’ for an opportunity to kill us in our sleep.”

I stared at him for a second before turning around and walking back to the car.

Or at least I tried.

Undyne grabbed me before I even made it halfway and set me back down on the porch.

I pouted and crossed my arms.

“Do I look like I fucking care what you want? The human has been through hell. And I've been through hell trying to find her. So I'm gonna leave her here and you're gonna be nice and treat her like family. Understood?”

Both skeletons were obviously afraid of her despite trying to look tough.

They both nodded and moved out of the way so I could step into the house.

Undyne beamed and walked inside with me so she could hand me a small box.

I looked at her confused.

“It’s a cell phone. Call me if these boneheads try to mess with you. I'm under ‘Bestie’

_Bestie?_

“It means best friend. You're gonna make a lot of those now.”

My mouth twitched again.

Annoyed I rubbed at it and watched as Undyne left. She looked towards me and whispered something to Papyrus and he looked towards me and nodded.

She waved one last time and left out the door. I could feel Sans staring at me so I turned around and stared right back.

“look human. if you try anything i won’t hesitate to give you a **BAD TIME**.”

I turned around and tried once again to walk out the door but this time the door locked as I touched the handle.

“sorry buddy but if undyne says you need protection then you’re getting protection.”

_Bull shiz_

I glared at him and walked with false confidence to the couch. This seemed to surprise and anger him as he frowned and disappeared in a flash of light.

“SANS! STOP BEING SO LAZY AND WALK UP THE STAIRS NEXT TIME!”

There was only a thump in response. By Papyrus’ response I could only assume it was an acceptable response.

“WELL HUMAN, LET ME SHOW YOU WHERE YOU’LL BE STAYING. I HAD PLANNED TO MAKE YOU DINNER, BUT I HAVE SOME SUSPICIONS THAT UNDYNE BROUGHT YOU EARLY TO MAKE ME LOOK BAD.”

I nodded and followed him up the stairs to my new room. I couldn’t remember the last time I slept in a real bed. I’ve always slept on the floor in chains. My arms were constantly tied up. He’d let them down when he remembers, other times I slept sitting up…

If I slept at all.

The room he led me to was the master bedroom. It made sense that neither of them would really need it. I doubted that they needed to actually use the toilet.

“MY ROOM IS ON THE LEFT SINCE THAT’S THE ROOM CLOSEST TO THE KITCHEN. SANS’ ROOM IS ON THE RIGHT SINCE IT HAS THE BIGGEST WINDOW.”

I nodded again and walked to the bed. It was a Queen size bed that was comfortable… too comfortable.

Papyrus stood in the door about to leave, but he suddenly stopped.

“I DOUBT YOU HAVE ANY CLOTHES SO I WILL HAVE MY BROTHER GIVE YOU SOME OF HIS UNTIL I CAN TAKE YOU TO GET SOME PROPER CLOTHING. MY REPUTATION WOULD BE RUINED IF ANYONE SAW YOU WALKING AROUND WITH ME.”

I had a feeling he added the last part just for show, but I didn’t say anything.

“DINNER WILL BE READY SOON.”

He closed the door and walked downstairs so I took that time to check out the bathroom. I haven’t seen my reflection for so long and Undyne refused to give me a mirror until she cleaned me up herself. My face looked well enough. I knew it would… He didn’t want anyone messing up the money maker. It was below the neck where it all started. I took off my shirt and examined my body for the first time in years. I feel like my skin would have been smooth and clear if it weren’t for the red raised marks on my skin. There were so many of them, some worse than others all disgusting looking. One in particular curled all the way around my stomach. I wasn’t exactly sure how he managed that, but he thought it was pretty cool. The worse on though… that was one that wasn’t made by a whip.

All of his clients thought the scars were sexy. They seemed to think they were make up. That all the marks were fake and showed my submissive attitude.

Others didn’t care.

The doctors tried to cover them up with bandages. They tried to give me all these creams that would supposedly make the scars heal better. I didn’t want any of that. All they did was hurt me more. Undyne didn’t like them either.

My breasts weren’t exactly big, but they weren’t small either. Every once in awhile he’d come and inject me with these chemicals that were supposed to induce growth. You know, to keep the customers happy.

I was happy when I threw up.

I looked through a couple of drawers until I found what I was looking for.

A pair of scissors.

Though before I could do what I wanted with them the door to the bathroom slammed open and Sans walked in with a black tee-shirt and a pair of shorts.

“this is my favorite shirt human, so you better- the fuck?!”

He looked at me up and down staring at the marks from the whip that my Uncle inflicted on me.

I walked to the door and grabbed the clothes out of his hand, knowing that the marks made him uncomfortable.

I put the shirt on and went to close the door again when he stopped me.

I stared at him for a moment and he stared at me.

_Does he want that? Would I even be able to protect myself if he tried? Undyne said I would be safe here. Did she lie? Were they all lying?_

I was helpless to do anything so I did what I did best.

I complied

I took off the shirt got down on my knees, and opened my arms.

“wha- what are you doing?”

I was very aware of how much I was shaking but what point was there in hiding it?

I stood up and grabbed a sharpie I had seen earlier.

I handed it to him and sat down with my back towards him.

I moved my hair out of the way and revealed the small permanent mark on my neck

A small tattoo that read

**_Property of  x_________ **

He suddenly knew what the marker was for.

_That was what he wanted right? To claim me? What is he waiting for?_

The marker flew across the room and made a dent in the opposite wall.

I flinched a bit.

Sans walked in front of me with an unreadable expression. He took the shirt he gave me from off the floor and put it over my head.

“i said take care of my fuckin’ shirt.”

Once the shirt was on he lifted me into his arms. Thankfully not irritating the scars.

“heyya boss!”

“WHAT DO YOU WANT SANS? CAN’T YOU SEE I’M MAKING DINNER? AND DIDN’T I TELL YOU NOT TO CALL ME BOSS?”

“when’s dinner gonna be ready?”

“IN A HOUR. WHY?’

“good. the kid n’ the weed are coming over.” He looked down at me, who was shaking still from the whole experience. “better hold on tight.”

“SANS WH-”

Suddenly the world shifted around us and twisted in strange and unnatural ways. Ways that reminded me of what people described as an ‘acid trip’ Soon all the colors drained away from the world and turned into a black darker than any black i’d ever seen. It was darker… yet darker.

The darkness was terrifying… yet soothing. Like, at some point in my life I had been there before. It was empty.. Yet there was something in it.

A man

A monster.

I only got a glimpse of  what he was before I was ripped away from this dark abyss and thrust into world of color once more. I was standing in a living room. Different from the previous one. This one seemed more homey. More safe.

A gasp came from somewhere behind me and I turned my head to see a large, female goat monster who was sitting in an armchair knitting.

“Sans? What are you-”

“tori, i need your help.”

“Sans. I do not understand. Who is this woman? What do you need my help with?”

Sans laid me on my stomach on the couch and lifted up my shirt to show the marks from the whip.

I felt warmth radiating from the goat lady and turned to see that she had fire coming from her... paws/hands...?

“Who harmed you child? Don’t worry. I’ll make their death slow and painful.”

_Wait. Wasn’t it quick and painless?_

“Sans. You did this didn’t you? You hurt this innocent child!”

_Innocent?_

“tori. you’re doing it again.”

The skeleton looked bored despite the the obvious threat in front of him.

**_Help him…_ **

_What? Who-_

**_Help him!_ **

The crazed goat too a step towards him and that sent my brain into overdrive.

I jumped up in between him and her and help my arms out.

“H-He didn’t d-do anything h-he was trying to help!”

It was the loudest I had spoke in years my voice hurt from misuse

“Child? Then who-”

“Whoever said blood was thicker than water lied… They are both pretty thick in betrayal.”

The goat nodded sadly and reached her hand out towards me. The sight of her hand coming towards me I recoiled into Sans.

“He hurt you a lot, didn’t he?” She asked.

I nodded.

“So I’m guessing no touching you until trust is established?”

I nodded again.

“Anyone you trust for sure?”

I thought for a second.

“Undyne.”

She looked thoughtful.

“So you’re saying. There is no way that anyone you don’t trust could lay a hand on you?”

I nodded again.

_It was a simple rule. I really don’t get what’s so hard to understand._

“So do you trust Sans?”

“What?”

“Well Sans has been hugging you since the beginning of this conversation and you don’t seem to be having a problem.”

I looked down at my midsection and sure enough two skeletal arms were wrapped tightly around me. I then looked up at Sans who seemed to be glaring daggers at the woman. He saw me looking at him and his sockets widened. He quickly looked away as red blushed formed on his face.

“you backed inta me and i had no other place ta put mah arms. don’ think nothin’ of it” I noticed his accent got thicker.

I pulled away from him and he dropped his arms to his side. I stared and stared at him for what seemed like ages before I finally reached out and grabbed his hand.

_Even the doctors scared me. Why am I not afraid of him? I mean i’m not afraid of Undyne but that’s for a completely different reason._

Something suddenly occurred to me.

“Name.” I said.

Goat Lady tilted her head.

“My name?”

She chuckled.

“The former Queen Toriel at your service.”

_Queen? That sounds pretty cool._

“what about you kid? you never told me your name.”

_Oh… that was probably rude. I’m sorry._

“It’s Shiri…”

“It’s a nice name.” Toriel said.

I looked at Sans, who just scoffed

“it’s cool, i guess.”

That damn itching again. It was like my mouth was trying to do something weird.

I opened my mouth to say something when my legs gave out from under me.

“hey!”

Sans caught me quick and brought me to the couch.

“I’m just not used to standing so long, that’s all.” I say and look at my feet. “I’m used to sitting down all the time...”

Sans looked at me skeptically.

“what? why?”

“Well... you don’t really have much walking room when you’re chained to a wall.”

The tension in the room grows.

_Stupid! Why can’t you just keep your mouth shut!_

“Child, is it okay if I heal... you know?” Toriel says.

I nod and lay back down onto the couch.

Her hands hover over the scars on my back and something like pin prints cover all of them. It’s uncomfortable but not painful. However, the whole experience is new. I not use to such gentleness. Despite having a hard demeanor, these monsters are actually nicer than anyone I’ve ever met!

“There you go, all healed! Well not all of them… but most are pretty faded”

“Thank you.” I say.

“yea tori. glad to see you put some… _backbone_ into it.”

_What?_

“Yea. I guess you could say without me you would’ve been pretty… _boned._ ”

_They did not just-_

“You’re right. Without you I would’ve been pretty… _bonely”_

They both looked at me with smirks on their faces.

_Don’t do it. Don’t show any weakness. Don’t you dare-_

“Pfft… Hahahaha!” I erupt into a fit of giggles despite myself.

I quickly cover my mouth and put back on my neutral expression.

“nope. nu- huh, you’ve already done it. you’ve laughed at our puns. you’ve damned yourself to hell.”

I looked at him and turned away.

“Oh _hell_ no.” I whispered.

_They didn’t hear that. They couldn’t have heard it._

They heard it.

As they erupted into giggles I finally figured out what that itch was…

A smile.


	2. A Mishap Perhaps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UG101: =)  
> Cyanide: What does that even mean?! *Facepalm*

“so where’s the kid?”.

Sans said sitting next to me on the couch as Toriel walked into the kitchen to make us tea.

“Oh you mean Frisk? She’s up in her room. She had a fight with Chara and they’re brooding in their room.”

Sans laughed and put his feet on my lap.

_ Hey! _

I glare at him and he rolls his eyes.

“trouble in paradise? hah serves the little demons right”

I gave him a confused stare.

“oh yea… you haven’t met them yet. Why don’t you go say hi?”

I looked at him nervously

“don’t worry they’re not  _ that _ dangerous.”

I dead panned and pushed his legs off of me causing him to roll of the couch.

“hey!”

I just snickered and walked towards the stairs.

Toriel walked out of the room.

“Their room is the second one of the left.” She said handing me a tray of tea. “Can you tell them that we’re going to eat at Sans’ place today?”

I nodded and walked upstairs to the room and held my hand to the door.

_ It’s just kids…  _

_ Human… kids… _

_ Sans did say that they consider themselves monsters so maybe they’re okay… _

_ Damn it just hurry up and knock already! _

With another deep breath I knocked lightly on the door. There was silence on the other side and only then did I realize there were voices in the first place. I thought that maybe they didn’t hear me but soon the door opened a crack to reveal…

A younger version of myself?

We both stared at each other for a moment our eyes widened and we pointed at each other with silent screams. 

“Frisk. What are you doing?” A voice said from inside the room.  “You  _actually_ managed to look like more of an idiot than normal. ”

The child turned around angrily and walked back into the room. It was then that I noticed another younger me and a small flower monster

**“You’re one to talk! Ms. I can’t even change the channel on TV!”**

“Take that back you brat!”

**“Make me ghost butt!”**

“Can you guys please stop fighting!”

**“Shut up Flowey!”**

I watched them fight for a few more moments before getting bored with the exchange. I tried snapping to get their attention but they weren’t listening. I tried to ask the flower for help but he was crying.

_ Okay stay calm- _

A pillow hit me in the face and all the children watched in horror as the tea fell to the floor.

“Frisk… Why does that woman look like me? And will she or will she not come after us for dropping that tea?”

I looked up from the mess in fear.

**“Are you okay?”**

_ They’re just kids… They won’t hurt me… right? _

I smiled and just picked up the mess.

“Y-y-you’re mom… downstairs… sans’ house for dinner…” 

“Human? Are you okay?” Flowey asked. I nodded and smiled again. “Can you please repeat what you said?”

I tried to but ended up being even quieter than before.

“Damn it! Frisk just get her the notepad!”

Frisk jumped up and grabbed a notepad and pencil and gave it to me. 

I quickly wrote down what I was trying to say.

‘Your mom want’s you to come down stairs because you are coming to Sans’ house for dinner.’

They all let out a ‘ohh’ then a ‘yay’

**“Their house is so fun!”**

“I wanna set it on fire!”

“I can relax!”

They all leave the room leaving me with my thoughts…

_ Wait… Look like her?  _

I brush off the comment and follow the kids downstairs. 

“Ah… there you are! Do you want to go over now?” Toriel says putting a coat on Frisk. I shake my head.

“I-I wasted the tea you gave me… do you have something I can use to clean it?” I ask. I see a quick movement of her hand and flinch. 

“Child. I’ll clean it don’t worry.”

**“Wait… wasn’t it me Chara who threw the pillow at you?”**

I shook my head.

“I-I should’ve held on tighter.”

Toriel frowned for a sec before walking to the kitchen to get cleaning supplies.

“Frisk! Chara! Go clean up that mess! What were you going to do when we got back and the stain set in?”

Frisk lowered her head in shame while Chara just shrugged and walked upstairs.

“come on kid. do you wanna help pap with dinner?”

I thought back to the last time I made dinner with my parents and smiled.

I nodded my head as we teleported back.

“hey bro, i’m bringing tori and the kids over for dinner, why don’t you try teaching shiri how to cook?”

“I ONLY NEED TO MAKE DESSERT, BUT I GUESS SHE COULD HELP ME. NOT THAT I NEED IT.”

I stepped into the kitchen just in time to see Papyrus elegantly chopping cinnamon.

“HUMAN, WHY DON’T YOU GET ME SOME EXTRA APPLES OUT OF THE FRIDGE?”

With a curt nod I quickly retrieved the apples.

“NOW CUT EACH ONE STRAIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE THREE TIMES AND THEN PUT THEM IN THE BOWL”

I followed his instructions then took out the cores since that was most likely what he would have asked next.

Afterwards, he taught me how to make dough.

“THEN YOU ROLL IT LIKE THIS!” He said rolling over the dough once with a pin. Then he gave me the rolling pin and grabbing my hand to show me how. I flinched back from him in surprise. For a moment he looked a bit offended before giving me an understanding smile.

“I see human.” He said in a voice quieter than I’ve ever heard. “You don’t have to worry about what you experienced with that bad human. We may not look like it but us monsters are a lot more kind than humans. I promise on my honor as the former captain of the royal guard that I will keep you safe.” I smiled grateful of his kindness

“Thank you Papyrus.” I said.

“HUMAN. IF I’M NOT MISTAKEN I COULD HAVE SWORN YOU-”

I put a finger to my mouth and started rolling the dough. 

“NO HUMAN YOU ARE DOING THAT ALL WRONG. LET THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS SHOW YOU HOW TO DO IT.”

And with that, the tender moment was gone and we finished making the pie.

“GOOD JOB, FOR A HUMAN. NOW I AM GONNA TAKE THE LASAGNA OUT OF THE OVEN AND THEN WE CAN PUT THE APPLE PIE INSIDE.”

Another nod as I watched as he took the lasagna out of the oven (to my surprise) with his bare hands and faced me.

“HUMAN I-”

“sup bro.”

Papyrus jumped and the meal dropped right out of his hands and I reached out to grab it forgetting that…

It was still burning hot.

My first instinct was to instantly drop it but I held onto it for the sake of saving dinner.

“SANS YOU CAN’T  DO THAT. YOU IMBECILE. WHAT IF I HAD DROPPED DINNER AND RUINED IT? THANK GOODNESS THE HUMAN WAS HERE TO SAVE IT. I HAD JUST TAKEN IT OUT OF THE OVEN AND-”

“wait… you   _ just  _ took it out.”

“YES”

“and the human caught it?”

“YES”

“without any gloves on?”

“SANS I REALLY DON’T SEE THE… HUMAN!!”

A whimper escaped me as Papyrus whipped around and grabbed the food out of my hand and Toriel turned me around to heal me.

“Child! What were you thinking?!”

I winced as she healed my hands.

“I-I didn’t w-want his hard work to go to waste.”

Chara and Frisk stare at me intensely before whispering to each other. I almost asked them what they were talking about but once again I got turned around by force.

“no more cooking you understand?” I nodded my head and Sans picked me up and sat me in a chair, then sat down next to me.

“WELP NOW THAT WE ARE ALL HERE I CAN SERVE DINNER. FINALLY HUMAN YOU CAN TRY MY CULINARY EXPERTISE. CAREFUL AS YOU MAY JUST DIE FROM GREATNESS.”

Sans rolled his eyes and watched as Papyrus put a serving on my plate. He looked at it for a moment before cutting it in half and putting half on his plate.

“you can ask for more if you’re still hungry later but your stomach has to get used to eating more food nowadays.”

I pouted for a second before he poked my face. 

“if you eat less pasta you get more pie.”

My eyes widened as I stared at him to my food and back to him.

“Fine…” I whispered and started to eat my food.

After I ate my small portion however…

“I’m full…”

Sans laughed so hard that he feel out of his chair while I just quietly fumed.

“Why don’t you go show the children your room and let some of your food digest?” Toriel said.

**“You live here?! That’s so cool!”**

“Are you dating one of the brothers?”

I shook my head and started walking towards the stairs.

**“So why are you here?”** Frisk said as we walked farther out of earshot of the goat mom and edgy skeleton.

“So Sans, let’s talk.”


	3. Good Dogs, Bad friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cyanide - Who is your favorite UT character? It doesn’t matter what AU  
> Lea - Hmmm that's difficult. I mean if I had to choose it would be either swap sans or... HMMM... either swap sans or under fell sans. Undertail sans is also a good one....  
> Cyanide - OOOOOOO YOU TAKE BLUEBERRY AND I TAKE HONEY!!!  
> Lea - OOOOOOOO!!!! Yes much yes!!! Blueberry muffins with a honey drizzle! Actually I've tried that and that's pretty good...  
> Cyanide - You need to let me try some of that!  
> "the do know we're right here?"  
> "JUST LET THEM BE BROTHER... CAN I HAVE A MUFFIN TOO?"

**Loneliness...**

_ “Help! Help me please!” _

**I can't remember a time without that feeling...**

_ “I want my daddy! Daddy, where are you?!” _

**Friends… Family…. All of that is an illusion….**

_ “Don’t touch me! You’re hurting me! Get Away!” _

**In movies they teach you that someone will always come save you.**

_ “Get it out! Get it out of me!” _

**That a prince in shining armor will swoop down and defeat the dragon.**

_ “Shut the hell up! You're garbage! You disgusting piece of shit!” _

**It's all a lie. There is no prince.**

_ “Such a sweet looking girl come here… I said get your ass over here and fuck me!” _

**There is only sorrow.**

_ “Aww fuck! Ugghhh uggghh! I think I'm gonna… I'm gonna! Uggghh!” _

**There is only hate.**

_ “Damn it! You're fucking pregnant?! You slut! I'm gonna beat the demon outta ya!” _

**Only the dragon.**

_ “Come on, Princess. There's somebody I want you to meet.” _

**You wish for death… You wish for someone, Anyone to save you.**

_ “Didn’t I tell you to keep your fucking mouth shut! Don't you ever say anything again. You fucking hear me?!” _

**But no one ever comes.**

_ “You’re safe now. I promise.” _

**You'll always be alone.**

_ “I promise on my honor as the former captain of the royal guard that I will keep you safe.” _

**No one will ever come save you.**

_ “It’s a nice name.” _

**You'll always be-**

_ “i said take care of my fucking shirt.” _

**You'll always-**

_ “tori, i need your help” _

**You'll-**

_ “nope. nu- huh, you’ve already done it. you’ve laughed at our puns. you’ve damned yourself to hell.” _

**…**

**If this is hell.**

**Then I've never been so glad to be damned.**

\---------------------------------------------------------

I looked at myself in the mirror.

_ I hate it. I hate all of it. _

I push everything away and grab the scissors, holding them close to my neck

_ I could end this right now if I wanted to... _

A buzz comes from my right pocket cutting off my thoughts and I pull out my phone, setting the scissors back on the counter.

**[Sugarskull]**

don’t even think about it sweetheart.

_ Oh right.  _ He’s  _ still here. _

I tap out a quick response.

**[XXX-XXX-XXXX]:**

How did you even know?

**[Sugarskull]**

i have my ways.

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]:**

You’re peeking through the bathroom door aren’t you?

And just as I said that, a red glow flashes through the bottom of the door.

**[Sugarskull]**

what? no i’m not!

**[XXX-XXX-XXXX]**

Whatever you say, sugarskull.

**[Sugarskull]**

hey don’t call me that!

**[XXX-XXX-XXXX]**

Sure thing… sugarskull.

I could hear a dish breaking from downstairs and giggled. I was a lot more confident in the things I said towards Sans and Sans was a lot nicer. Though, Sans’ temper was as short as his dick… not that I would know I mean. It was just an expression. I don’t even want to see that fuckers dick. No doubt it would be too tiny to even do any-

Aaaaanyway.

Me and Undyne hang out practically everyday. Sans just kind of sticks close to make sure Undyne doesn’t impale me when he’s not looking or something. Which is really weird considering she’s always been really gentle and protective of me… except when she tries to get me in new clothes.

Everything she picks is always so… revealing.

“Punk where are ya?!” Undyne yells from downstairs.

I quickly shoot her text that I’m in the bathroom and pick up the scissors. I hold them close to my head again as a memory passes through my brain.

_ “Come here you bitch!” I shakily stand up and walk towards him. I stop only inches in front of him. He’s sitting in the arm chair in front of the fireplace stroking his member tenderly. _

_ “Turn around.” He says. I silently listen. “Sit.” I sit on the floor in between his legs without hesitation. He gingerly grabs some of my long hair and kisses it. _

_ I shiver involuntarily. _

_ “You’re hair is so long and beautiful. It’s your best feature. I get hard just thinking about it.” _

_ I don’t bother moving and just let him ramble. After he finishes speaking he grabs a little more of my hair and wraps it around his member. _

_ “It’s just a shame that you don’t grace me with that oh so sensual voice of yours.” He says as he tries to jerk off with my hair. The only thing he accomplishes was hurting himself. _

_ “Damn!” He lists off a couple swears before regaining his composure. “No worries. I guess I can try something else new. Lay on your stomach!” _

_ I lay on my stomach and he climbs on top of me. _

_ “Now. No matter how much I pull your hair you can never try to pull away, understand?” _

_ I don’t bother nodding since, I knew he wouldn’t bother listening, as he thrusts in... _

_ The _

_ Wrong _

_ Hole. _

_ The new sensation is painful. I instantly want it out. I can’t handle it. _

_ Then he pulls on my hair so hard that I think It’s gonna rip out. _

_ I don’t pull it away from him. _

_ Instead I focus on nothing. I focus on the dark abyss. I focus on feeling no emotion until I’m completely numb. _

_ There was only one thought I could think in that painful moment. _

_ I hate my hair. _

I shakily rid my mind of the memory and with one swift movement.

It was gone.

Around my feet was a ring of dark brown hair.

I looked back at my reflection and my heart, no soul, instantly felt better.

“What the hell are you doing in there punk?! Takin’ a shit?” I quickly shove the hair into a trash bag and open the door. Undyne is standing on the other side of the door holding another bag of clothes. She takes one look at me and shoves the bag at me.

“Hurry up and put that shit on!” She says and slams the door, not even acknowledging the sudden change.

I take one look at the outfit and cringe.

The shorts were too short and the shirt showed waaay too much cleavage. I decided to humor her though. If I didn’t she’d just bitch the whole day.

I put on the black shorts and the red shirt. I looked at myself as I put on the leather jacket and cringed inwardly.

**XXX-XXX-XXXX**

I look like a fucking hooker.

**[Sushi]**

You don’t look like anything until I see you!

I sigh and walk out the bathroom.

Undyne’s eyes practically sparkled as she takes a look at me.

“Now let’s get some makeup on you!”

And with that one comment I ran.

“Hey wait a minute!”

I ran straight down the stairs and launched myself straight at the sleeping skeleton.

“woah! what’s wrong with you kitten?”

Sans has been trying out nicknames for me for the past few days. Every once in awhile he comes up with one that makes me cringe… this is one of them.

I leaned in close.

“First of all, no and second, Undyne is trying to make me dress like hooker!”

Undyne crossed her arms in defiance.

“I am not! I’m just trying to create a style for her.”

Sans looked at me.

“stand up and let me see ya.”

I reluctantly stood up and let him get a good look at me.

His sockets widened when he saw my hair. He grabbed a lock of it and smiled.

“don’t leave even one reminder.” he whispered.

With a wide smile I nodded. He nodded back and motioned for me to twirl. 

I turned around and he got a look at me.

“well i kinda like it.”

I stiffened and felt my face heat up. I turned myself back around so he wouldn’t see my red face.

“Never mind.” Undyne said. “If Sans likes it then it must look terrible.”

“hey!” he said, offended.

“Let’s go get you something else.”

She reaches for me but I pull away.

“I-It’s not that bad…”

Undyne stares at me like I just grew a third eye.   
“Didn’t you just say you look like hooker?”

My face started heating up again.

“I-I just think I might be missing something…”

I looked around and my eyes landed on Sans collar. I quickly launched myself at him and took it off.

“hey! what the-?”

I put it on and smiled.

“That actually looks good on you punk! Good job!”

I looked at Sans for his opinion but I only got a look at a red faced skeleton.

“y-you look good, sweetheart.” he said.

“Well, I like sweetheart better than kitty” I mumbled under my breath

Sans’ entire face went red and then mine does too when I realized he heard me.

“l-let’s go.” he said and grabbed my arm.

“Wait a minute! You can’t just take her! I had her first!”

Sans smiled and pulled me close.

“well i have her now.” Sans stuck his tongue out and like the day I met him the world shifted and blurred until we were in another place entirely.

“Sans!”

“Hey Sans!”

“Go fuck yourself!”

Sans glared at the particular UFO shaped monster and  growled

“Fuck off Jerry.”

Sans led me to a bar and introduced me to the flaming bartender.

He was nice…

And a bit flirtatious

“Hey Sans!” A dog monster yelled from a table full of other dog monsters.

_ Are they... playing poker? _

Sans instantly became his try hard self and glared at him.

“what the ‘ell you want doggo?”

“I thought you hated humans. Why the hell are you all over one?” He seemed to think for a second and realization crossed his face “Oh, wait I get it! How much does she charge? She’s got a pretty nice body. Maybe I could get behind a princess like that.”

I could feel all the heat leave my body as he was talking. I suddenly felt sick and the urge to run.

_ I’m not a princess! Don’t ever call me that! No… I can’t… He’s not… ! I need to go! I can’t… I… _

I didn’t even realize that I had started hyperventilating and curling in on myself.

“doggo you piece of shit! you wanna say that shit to my face?!”

Doggo put his hand up defensively.

“Hey, I just can’t imagine you with a human. Especially one so… broken.”

_ I’m sorry I’m sorry, I’m- _

“let me get something straight. first of all, i’m not fuckin’ nobody. second of all, when did i give you permission to look at  _ my _ human’s soul? did i  _ say _ you could judge her and deem her broken? when did i tell you that you get to tell me how to run my life?  _ my _ human is just the way I like her. she is not a princess you understand? S H E I S A Q U E E N”

Doggo looked like he was about to piss his pants. He whimpered and walked towards me with his tail between his legs.

“now apologize and mean it because it’s your fault she’s like that.”

Doggo looked genuinely surprised and upset.  It was like he didn’t even see how his words affected me before Sans pointed it out.

“Isn’t that the-

“Human that Undyne found-”

“In that man’s basement-” there were murmurs among the crowd but two dogs stood out from the rest. They looked at me with pity in their dark eyes. 

Sans groaned. 

“I’m sorry human … please forgive me. If I knew you were that human I wouldn’t have said anything” His apology snapped me out of my panic attack. He looked genuinely sad and regretful. I’d rather him not say anything like that to  _ anyone,  _ but something about his apology made me think that he wasn’t at all a bad dog.

“Good boy.” I whispered and hugged him.

I mustn’t’ve been as quiet as I thought because suddenly every dog in Grillby’s came running at me asking to be pet and called a good dog.

_ What’s going on? Are they gonna eat me. _

I looked at Sans for assistance but he looked just as confused as me.

All the affection was suffocating but…. Nice.

“good... dogs…” I said quietly and all the dogs went crazy. Sans looked worried for a second but started laughing eventually. It was all good natured until one dog with a long neck licked my face. Then, all of a sudden all the dogs were engulfed in a red light and thrown on the other end of the bar.

“Calm down Sans. They aren’t trying to kill her. They were just having fun. Maybe you should have a little fun yourself” Grillby said with a wink. The dogs whimpered and went to sit down. I felt a little bad but I was more worried about Sans. 

“grillbz!” The skeleton in question yelled before storming off mumbling something about needing a smoke.

The whole bar just laughed as another human walked.

Well another  _ two  _ humans walked. One was a particularly attractive female with long brown hair and a red dress that was three sizes two small. The other was a male? Female? Either way they were in a hoody with the hood pulled up and a pair of sneakers.

“Oh well, well, well, what do we have here?” The woman said. “If it isn’t the neighborhood fuck machine?” I froze in my seat and turned away to look at Grillby who had stopped cleaning a glass to observe the two new humans.

The lady came up to my and turned me to face her and look into her chocolate eyes.

“Last time I checked you were locked up in a basement like the whore you were? Did your pimp finally let you outta the house?” I kept my resolve and turned back to my food. I looked back up at Grillby who gave me a look as if to say “  _ you want me to kick them out?”  _ I just shook my head and continued to eat my food as if to pretend that they weren’t talking to me.

The lady didn’t like that very much as shown by the fact that they grabbed the closest bottle of mustard and sprayed it on me.

“Hey bitch! I’m talking to you!”  She yelled. Finally the hoodie grabbed her before she could do anymore damage.

“She doesn’t talk Lea, remember?”

She just snatched her arm away from them.

“That doesn’t give her the right to ignore me UG”

She raised her arm to hit me and I could see every monster in the bar tense up in a fighting position just waiting for her to try.

“Let me handle this Lea.” She says turning to me. “Hello my name is Ultimate but most people just call my UG.”

_ Is that because you put the UG in UG--ly? _

“You can just call me… anytime…”

_ What. Was that? _

“Are you a strawberry?” She asks.

I scoot away.

“Because I’d love to put  _ you  _ in my mouth.”

_ Abort mission! Mayday Mayday! _

“Are you my fridge?”

_ Please stop... _

“Because I’d love to…Eat. you -” She was cut off by a bone sailing three centimeters in front of their face.

“i’ll give you three seconds to get away from  **m y  g i r l** ” Sans says holding another bone in his hand.

“Oooh! So you went from fucking every person on the block to fucking monsters? What? Did you run out of normal people to fuck?” The woman says laughing.

_ What? _

“I mean really? How low can you go? These creatures are disgusting enough without  _ you  _ contaminating them? I mean how many STD’s have you got?”

Sans threw another bone, this one scrapped her face.

“listen here an’ listen good ya self centered bitch. that girl you’re callin’ a ‘whore’ has been missing fer over ten years. ya wanna know why? because her damn  _ uncle  _ decided to off her mom and use her body to make quick bucks. she didn’ have a fuckin’  _ choice  _ . now here I am havin’ ta pick up all the damn pieces humans like  _ you  _ broke her into.”

_ Oh… _

Sans froze mid rant to look at me realizing what he said.

“wait uh… sweetheart that’s not what i meant.” I just smiled and waved it off.

“That’s so…” I looked at Lea who had her head covered by her hands and was shaking.

_ Is she crying? _

I reached my hand out to her to try to console her but Grillby sizzled loudly and the dogs growled.

“Hilarious…” Lea finally said.

_ What? _

“You know my mom knew your parents. Your mom was a whore who went on trips to fuck her coworkers and your dad was a deadbeat. Everyone in town thought you died with your mom until one day a couple months ago someone found you suckin’ dick for a quick buck in your uncle’s basement. It was  _ hilarious  _ . And now you supposedly were ‘kidnapped’ hah! With what proof? No one’s gonna believe a whore like you.”

The whole bar was practically dripping with anger. I could feel the danger radiating off of Sans.

“you fuckin-”

She backhanded him.

“You  _ don’t  _ get to talk to me like that you dirty-”

I snapped and rammed my fist straight into her smug face.

“Bitch!” She screamed out of pain and immediately went after me while her friend just watched with a smile on their face. I dodged and Sans restrained her. He was about to say something but I held my hand up and cleared my throat.

I grab the edges of my shirt and tug it off.

“what the hell are you doing?!”

I ignored Sans fuming and turned my back to her.

Toriel may have been able to heal my current wounds but I will always have my scars.

I heard Lea gasp alongside of all the other monsters in the bar.

“How did-”

“Whips… Every time I did something he didn’t like… and the biggest one… the one that goes from my left shoulder to the right side of my waist… that was where he tried killing me a few years back after someone almost found out about me. Talking was forbidden after that…”

I put my shirt back on and turned back to face her, genuinely surprised to see her crying.

“I-I’m sorry… I really thought that…”  

“When something really bad happens to someone it’s easier to believe that they faked the whole thing than to believe the world is really that cruel.” Grillby said, his flames finally calming down.

I turned back to her remembering something.

“Oh and touch my bestfriend again and I will not hesitate to give you a  **B A D  T I M E** .”

She shivers and nods furiously.

UG claps her hands together and smiles.

“Drinks for everyone on me!”

The mood instantly shifts and everyone cheers. The tense moment instantly forgotten as everyone goes back to their regular activities.

Well almost everyone.

Sans however seemed to be frozen in a block of stone.

“Uh is the bag of bones okay?” Lea said.

I shrugged and got really close to his face.

_ Sans? _

I knocked on his skull a couple of times he just fell backwards like a cardboard cutout.

I just gave Grillby a questionable stare and he shrugs.

I just ended up adding it to list of weird things Sans does.

“So you knew all along what was going to happen didn’t you?” Grillby asks UG who just smiles.

“Lea is a bit of a himedere since her parents are super rich. She needed to realize that some problems are bigger than she can realize. Ever since Shiri was little she was a pretty real person.”

“You knew her when she was younger?”

“Yea we were friends but I doubt she’d remember me.”

I turned towards her and stared really hard.

Lightbulb!

“You had a crush on me didn’t you?” I whispered, once again self conscious of my voice.

She just blushed and looked away.

“Yea… you gave me food.”

I just giggled oblivious to the dark presence behind me.

“you wot mate?”

I turned to see Sans behind me.

_ Yay! He’s awake! _

Sans growled and quickly put my hand on his arm and shook my head.

Sans raised a bonebrow not taking his eyes off of UG

“i don’t trust these people kitten…”

I gave him a look that said  _ I trust them. _

“fine... i’ll be… tolerant.”

Suddenly Lea tackled me into a hug.

“I promise to do whatever I can to get you to forgive me! I was wrong! I promise never to say anything mean to you again!”

“believe it when i see it.”

She turned to Sans and raised a fist.

“You wanna say that again bonehead? I’ll knock your block off!”

“i’d like to see you try!”

I can already tell that my life is going to get ten times more interesting.


	4. Don't mess with the Text

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Runner up chapter titles-  
> Breaking Your Fucking Walls  
> How do You Know, Sans  
> Culture shock?  
> Why the world should end 2017  
> What is the world  
> What happened to the world  
> Not the Trump Stump  
> What is life meme  
> Such culture, Many Crackheads  
> What is Britany Spears

It’s been a couple days since the incident at the bar and I had been texting Lea and UG everyday since. They quickly became some of my best friends.  I had been texting them on the couch while eating Oreos, much to Sans’ dismay, when suddenly UG texts the group chat.

**[MEME LORD]**

Hey guys

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

Yeah?

**[Hime]**

What?

**[MEME LORD]**

Guys

**[Hime]**

We already said what, now what is it?

**[MEME LORD]**

Oh, sorry. Lag.

**[MEME LORD]**

You know when you start talking to someone and you don’t know when to be weird because you don’t know if they’re weird?

**[Hime]**

I’m never weird.

**[MEME LORD]**

Don’t lie, you tell puns when you and I are alone. It’s relentless…

**[Hime]**

CONTINUE YOUR JOKE.

**[MEME LORD]**

Okay, okay.

This is me totally.

*insert the funny link woop woop*

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

Hahaha! Funny lel xD

**[Hime]**

That was good, it made me laugh somewhat.

**[MEME LORD]**

Wait… GUYS GUYS!

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

What what

**[Hime]**

You’ve used two ‘guys’ so it must be important. What is up?

**[MEME LORD]**

What if Sans was a slut?

XDXD

I took a moment to reread the text and then burst out laughing. I was lucky that I was in the house alone. Papyrus and Sans were gone so I was free to cackle about this thought all I wanted. I barely managed to type out a reply. This was one of the reasons I loved talking to these guys.

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

OH MY GOD I’M DYING XD

Where the heck did that come from??

**[Hime]**

Why would he be a slut?

**[MEME LORD]**

No, just theoretically, think about it.

What if there was another universe where Sans was sexy?

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

I mean he’s not that bad looking in the first place but I have a feeling that’s just about as likely as Jerry being popular

**[MEME LORD]**

Or as likely as him being hot.

Like, he has tentacles…

**[Hime]**

What.

WHAT- WHY WOULD-

NO  
AGGHH THAT’S DISGUSTING

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

I think Lea doesn’t like Jerry

**[MEME LORD]**

Nobody likes Jerry XD

**[Hime]**

HE’S THE ALL THE INSULTS

FUCK JERRY

**[MEME LORD]**

Woah, language there Hime.

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

I’ve never heard you curse before?

**[Hime]**

WELL HE’S WORTH CURSING

**[MEME LORD]**

He’s not that bad…

**[Hime]**

You haven’t met him…

**[MEME LORD]**

That’s right, I haven’t… I want to though!

**[Hime]**

NO YOU DON’T! He’s the most vile thing I have ever met. His tentacles all squishy and disgusting UGGH

THEY MAKE NOISES AS THEY MOVE IT’S GROOOOSSSSS

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

Okay! T.M.I

[MEME LORD]

But guys just imagine Jerry saunters over to you, a sassy little smirk upon his UFO-shaped face. "Hey babe, I got a question for you..." Slowly, he leans in close, wrapping his arms around you as he breathes gently into your ear...  
  
"...do you have the WiFi password?"

**[Hime]**

AHHHHHHHH  
NO WHY

THAT’S NO

…

I AM SO BLOCKING YOU.

**[MEME LORD]**

Noooo please Hime-sans

**[Hime]**

Bye I’m done.

**[MEME LORD]**

Nooooo

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

Lea, wait, think about… Uhm…

I tried to think of anything that would get her mind off of Jerry… Ah! That’s it!

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

What if Sans was cute and didn’t have any sharp teeth!

**[Hime]**

…

That would be adorable.

**[MEME LORD]**

I AM SO GONNA DRAW THAT

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

Wait, just make sure Sans doesn’t see it

-snazzy man snas has joined the chat-

[ **snazzy man snas]**

who the fuck changed my name again? wait... what the hell were you guys talking about?!

**[MEME LORD]**

AHHH WE’VE BEEN SPOTTED! SCATTER!

**[Hime]**

GET TO THA CHOPPAH!!!

**[MEME LORD]**

YOU DID HAVE IT IN YOU!

**[Hime]**

LEAVE THE FREAKING CHAT UG

**[XXX-XXX-XXX]**

EEEP! BYE SANS

**-MEME LORD has left the chat-**

**-Shiriously Strange has left the chat-**

**-Hime has left the chat-**

**[snazzy man snas]**

what the fuck?!

I was still trying to get control of my laughter when Sans came home. It was a quiet laughter. The kind that you had when something was so funny that you couldn’t even make a sound.

“nice to see you laughing your ass off at my expense”

“It was s-so funny though!” I barely managed to spit that out before going back to silently laughing… My ass off apparently, what a weird expression.

“i picked up some grub.” He held up a brown paper bag with a fire logo on it.

I forced myself to regain my composure. There was food after all.

I reached for the bag but Sans quickly snatched it out of my reach.

“nuh-uh. not until you apologize for whatever the hell that was.”

I debated in my mind for a second before letting out a sly smile.

“I’m sorry.” I said “that you got so butthurt.” I added as soon as he gave me the burger.

“you’ve been hanging out with those girls too much damn it!”

I stuck my tongue out but he quickly grabbed it.

“Geh-!”

“what’s wrong sweetheart?” He leaned forward a bit, making my eyes dart up to his head. Only then did I realise where this was going.

“cat got your tongue?” He had…

_Oh my God. XD_

On his head were two red translucent cat ears. It took a moment but the pun clicked and I burst out laughing my head suddenly whipping forward.

Into his face.

He sputtered at the sudden outburst and pulled away from me, rubbing his forehead..

“ugh- damn that fucking hurt!” His red ears disappeared from his head and before he could say anything else, we heard muffled music come from behind the door and suddenly the door busted off of it’s hinges.

“I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BAAAALLLL!!!” Undyne barged in scream-singing her head of with a stereo on her shoulder. “I NEVER HIT SO HARD IN LOOOVE!!!” I  had no idea what she was singing but it sounded awesome. “ALL I WANTED WAS TO BREAK YOUR FUCKING WALLLLSS!!!”

“those aren’t even the right lyrics you fucking fish!”

“And how would you know that??” She retorted with a smug grin.

Sans went red and crossed his arms.

“fuck you!”

I raised my hand to get their attention.

“What? Why are you raising your hand?”  
I just shrugged.

“Seemed appropriate at the time. But I wanted to ask… who sings that song? I like it.”

Undyne gave an incredulous look.

“You don’t know Miley Cyrus?”

A bulb went off.

“You mean Hannah Montana?”

Both monsters face palmed.

“You’re gonna be in for a pretty rude awakening.”

I was confused. What did she mean ‘rude awakening’?

“Hannah Montana was cancelled. Miley Cyrus is Hannah Montana.” Undyne put her hand in her jean pocket and pulled out her phone.

“And she invented this.” She tapped a few times and turned the phone around so I could see. It was a video of Hannah- Miley Cyrus doing...

_What is she doing?_

“It’s called twerking.”

_My childhood is ruined…_

“W-why though…? I thought Disney stars were cool! What about Lindsey Lohan? She’s still cool right?”

I hear Sans snicker behind me and turned my head towards him. He was trying hard to stay stone faced but it was failing miserably.

“What? I don’t get it? Why are you guys laughing so much!?”

Undyne was barely able to tap her phone with shaking hands, when she turned it around…

I think a little of me died inside.

“Well…” I was speechless. “I guess Disney stars can’t stay innocent forever… Well,” I tried to be optimistic. “At least I always have my favorite actor Robin Williams!”

The two monster shared a silent conversation through their eyes.

He scratched the back of his head. “uh... sweetheart, uh, damn how do i say this…” My eyes widened.

“He didn’t become like… like _that_ right?!” Sans was caught off guard and burst out laughing.

“n-no, he didn’t become like that. like a man as sweet as him could be like the others! hah!” My shoulders sagged with relief.

“Phew…”

“but there… there’s somethin’ you should know.” He looked up at me with sad eyelights. “he... he passed away. died.”

And with that… I ran upstairs and I locked myself in my room.

“sweetheart, please open your door…” My eyes drifted over to my closed bedroom door.

I snuggled deeper within the recesses of my blanket fort. I didn’t want to see anyone at the moment.

“You can teleport, w-why don’t you teleport in here then?” I whispered sadly. I heard him sigh on the other side of the door.

“because i have a bit of decency at least. and i also want you to open the door yourself.” The sounds of something crinkling brought my attention away from my thoughts.

“plus, i got oreos.” I rolled over and debated my options.

Either stay in my warm blanket fort to wallow in sadness.

Or eat oreos while in my sad blanket fort with Sans…

I got up reluctantly, stretching and letting my bones pop. I hobbled over to the door and put my hand on the knob to turn it.

Once I opened the door I saw Sans’ concerned face and immediately felt worse.

“you okay kitten?”

“I still hate that nickname…” I whispered.

He chuckled sadly and held up the double stuffed oreos.

“can i join?”

I moved out of the way and let him in the room. His eyes lingered on the blanket fort for a moment.

“nice fort you got there. you got a real talent.”

“Thanks…”

I crawled into it and he crawled in after me.

“Undyne?” I whispered not bothering to look at him.

“pap came home so they’re cooking dinner.”

I nodded.

“You know Sans… I missed so much when I was…. You know?” He nodded. “I just… everything is so different now. I feel like an outsider. I feel like I don’t belong in this world anymore.”

Sans stroked my hair gently.

“heh... how do you think we felt when we first came out of the underground? a bunch of grumpy monsters don’t exactly fit in well with the current population.”

My eyes widened and I waved my hands frantically.

“Oh! I’m sorry! Here i am complaining about my stupid human problems are you’re dealing with stuff way worse!”

He just laughed and put an arm around me.

“just because i’m going through something doesn’t make your problems invalid. all i’m saying is… i understand what you’re going through…”

I hugged him and he froze up a moment before hugging back, a small red glow coming from his face.

“just know,sweetheart. you’ll always have a place with us.” My eyes started drooping slowly.

“and even if both monsters and humans shun you, you’ll always have a place...."

 

 

But I was already fast asleep.


	5. HUGGLE PUGGLE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ya get to know some shiz and run face first into a tree. Also get some cuddles.
> 
>  
> 
> (Lea did most of this chapter. Give her a round of applause.)

“I JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND UNDYNE. I'M THE MOST ATTRACTIVE AND GREAT SKELETON IN ALL THE LAND. WHY WON’T THE HUMAN TALK TO ME?”

“You don’t even try to understand her at all! You just give her advice about stupid stuff.”

Papyrus stomped his foot.

“MY ADVICE IS VITAL TO SURVIVING ON THE SURFACE. FURTHERMORE, WHEN DID YOU BECOME SO WEAK UNDYNE? EVER SINCE WE’VE GOT UP HERE YOU’VE BEEN PITYING THESE PATHETIC CREATURES.”

Undyne summoned a spear and pointed it at the skeleton.

“I’ll show you weak! You wanna go?! You know nothing about true strength!”

Papyrus summoned a bone and pointed it right back at her.

“AND YOU DO? BOTH YOU AND SANS HAVE TURNED SOFT. IF YOU WANT TO TEACH A CHILD YOU NEED TO BE STRICT. DON’T GIVE THEM ANY ROOM TO REBEL.”

Undyne let out a frustrated battle cry and tossed a spear at him full speed; Papyrus did the same. Both weapons hit each other and flew in a random direction. A squeak of fear was heard

From the side of both monsters and they whipped their heads in the direction of the sound.

Both weapons had landed right above my head as I walked out of the kitchen.

The eyes of both monsters widen and the weapons disappear. 

I quickly take out my phone and type out a message

 

**[XXX-XXX-XXXX]**

SOS?

**[snazzy man snas]**

im bored anyway. 

 

I gave them a polite nod and suddenly Sans teleported in and teleported me out leaving them both confused and angry.

“Look what you did!” Undyne screamed. “Why did I even think it was a good idea to leave her with you?!” Undyne punches a wall. “Both you and your brother are horrible caretakers!”

Papyrus flinched when she mentioned Sans.

“LEAVE MY HOUSE.”

Undyne blinked. “What?” Papyrus repeated himself and she laughed. “Haha! Nice try bud, but like hell, I’m gonna-” She was cut off by Papyrus stepping two feet and getting right up in her face.

Papyrus lowered his voice and glared at her, magic flaring up with a fury as he stared into her defiant eye. “I Said… Leave. Now.”

Undyne’s left eye twitched and a scowl plastered itself onto her face. Ripples of anger made their way through Papyrus’s mind as Undyne grabbed his armor and growled.

“Fine. But if you hurt one hair on her head...” He could feel the air crackle around them. “I swear to Asgore I will end you.” She dropped his battle body and turned around abruptly, walking out the entrance and slamming the wooden door behind her.

Papyrus took a moment.

Then he screeched in anger and began stomping/pacing around the living room, thinking of reasons to go to Undyne’s house so he could beat some sense into her. Maybe burn down her house while he was at it. Of course, he quickly composed himself and thought for a moment.

“The human will take my side. The human will love me. But how?”

 

We sat at the bar, and I idly swung my legs underneath the stool.

“pap and undyne arguing again?” San asked as he took a swig of mustard.

I stopped swinging my feet and paused. I nodded after a moment of silence and put my head on the bar, it was nice and cool.

“what’s wrong, kitten?”

I lifted my head up to look at him sadly and picked at my fries. 

“Papyrus…” I said and put my head down once again.

“yea he’s a handful. i could hear a bit of the argument from my room. something about you not talking to him? now, why don’t you tell me why that is, sweetcheeks?”

I threw a fry at him and frowned a bit.

“He’s just… Very enthusiastic… And intimidating…” I started visibly shaking “I feel more comfortable when it's just smiling and nodding. It’s safer… He’s bigger and stronger than me... Just like-”

Sans held up a hand to cut me off. 

“i get it… he’s da boss. the destroyer of humans! but between you and me…” Sans leaned in closer. “he’s secretly just acting tough. he’s only hurt one person and that was pretty much a fluke. now me? i’m the one who does all the killin’. i’m the one you should be afraid of.”

He started flashing his teeth and growling. His eye was flashing red and the whole restaurant went quiet. 

Well except for me. 

I was laughing. 

Sans turned bright red and pulled up his hood...

“Da ‘ell you laughin’ for. dat usually scares evry’body”

I giggled again and smiled. 

“I kinda… felt this strange feeling. In the pit of my stomach. I can’t really describe it…. It’s kinda like a sinking feeling. I think I felt it once while I was… with him. I don’t know if it’s good or bad but I liked it. You don’t seem scary to me… I only feel new feelings when I’m with you.”

He looked at me with a studying gaze for a moment with only the sound of Grillby’s flames filling the room. For a moment I heard a small snicker but there was a grunt and then more silence. Slowly but surely his face turned into one of realization and embarrassment as he cleared his throat and covered his face completely with his hood. 

Grillby busted out into a full-on laugh and suddenly the whole restaurant followed. I felt embarrassed and scared.

“Are they… laughing at me?” I asked Sans with tears in my eyes. Grillby quickly gave me another burger and a soda.

“No” He leaned in close. “We’re laughing at Sans”  

Sans lifted his head up and grabbed the burger.

“We’re leaving!” He yelled and teleported us back to the living room. 

 

The living room was strangely dark. All the blinds and the curtains pulled shut. Only the silhouettes of the furniture visible. Though on the couch was the large outline of a man. I held on tight to Sans and he turned on the lights.

“boss you’re scaring the kid-” I held on a little tighter as Papyrus stood up. 

I could hear Sans gulp. 

“you’re scaring kitten.” I looked at him and I could see his eyelights flash up to my face as a little blush stained his face. 

What was he looking at?

Papyrus took a quick step in our direction and quickly pulled me out of my thoughts. 

“I WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO THE HUMAN IN PRIVATE.” 

Sans looked towards me again and frowned.

“i don know boss, we were kinda plannin’-”

“I-'ll do it….” I said quietly. 

“are you sure?” 

I nodded and slowly pulled away from Sans.

“Jus’ call me if you need help.”

I nodded and shook my phone in my hand. 

Sans gave me one last look before teleporting off. 

And then there was two…

“HUMAN. I DEMAND THAT YOU TELL ME-” 

I flinched.

He gave me a strange look before clearing his throat.

They’re skeletons… why do they keep doing that?

“I want you, to tell me why you refuse to speak to me.” He said and wrung his hands together as he looked off into the distance. 

I was slightly taken aback by his change of tone and sudden nervousness.

“I-I…”  I struggled to find the proper words. “Y-you remind me… of him…” I said quietly. “He was a-always loud when he… you know… and you dress kinda scary, with spikes and stuff and you… threaten everyone… I just thought…”

Papyrus’ face was blank. I couldn’t read the expression on his face. 

“Thought what human?”

I looked away from him and started biting my lip. 

“I-I thought you didn’t want me to speak just like him… I thought that you’d rather I stay quiet and… just do everything you say…”

Papyrus looked at me for a moment before dropping down to one knee, then the other. 

Slowly he took off his gloves and revealed… 

A small metal plate stuck to his hand.

The plate read

‘2-P’

I gasped as I saw it was bolted into his hand. I slowly reached out to touch it as he flinched. 

“D-does it hurt?” 

Papyrus shook his head. 

“Just hasn’t been touched in awhile…” He slowly put his gloves back on. “Do you know what this is?” 

I shook my head slowly.

“You ever notice how Sans and I are the only skeleton monsters?”

I thought about it for another moment and slowly nodded realizing he was right.

“Well, that is for a very good reason… Sans and I weren’t always the only skeletons… There was one other one. I can’t really remember him much but… he wasn’t always a monster.” I slowly dropped to the floor so I could hear his story more clearly. However, when I sat down I landed on the lap if Sans who I didn’t notice was there.

“don’t mind me, just let him speak.” 

I nodded again and turned back to Papyrus who was now sitting with his legs crossed. 

“Doctor William Donald Aster. I think his name was. He was apparently a world-renowned human scientist that fell down into the underground. He had fallen before the first child had… also fallen. He was first feared, then loved by all of the monster kind. When Asgore had found out that he was a scientist he entrusted him to find a way out of the underground using whatever means necessary. He… had quickly thought of a way… genetically engineered human and monster souls… He had developed a serum. That would turn any monster half human using very powerful magic. But no monster was willing to try it, all too scared that it would have disastrous side effects. With no test subjects, he went with his only other choice… to experiment on himself. He injected the serum into his bone marrow.” 

I gasped thinking of how much that must have hurt. Both Sans and Papyrus shivered.

“No one knows how long he was in his lab for. Minutes? Hours? All they did know was that when he came out he was a screaming ball of rotting flesh and blood. His skin falling off his bones and his blood turning a sickening blue color. Within moments all that was left…. Was a deformed skeleton in a lab coat. When his soul was examined there was no human left in him. There was the only monster. He felt… disgusted, like he didn’t even deserve to considered human anymore. So.. he wasn’t. He changed his name to Doctor Wing Dings Aster. And kept on with his experiments. Despite his grief. And that was when he thought of us.”

The next few moments were filled with a tale of horror. Wing Dings, or Gaster as they called him. Grew them from his own hands. 

No pun intended

He had used his own bone to grow Sans and Papyrus. Or 1 - S and 2 - P.

The experiments that were conducted on them were terrible. From the way the pain was described it was torture.

Papyrus explained that through all of that he tried desperately to stay kind. That he gave Aster the benefit of the doubt through every single experiment. However soon, he couldn’t even do that. 

“One day…. He almost killed Sans… it was just a routine experiment to see if he could increase the HP of a soul to accommodate the damage that it would take to break the barrier. I couldn’t… I still can’t imagine what caused him to do this but he pushed and pushed Sans’ soul past the line that he usually did and-”

Sans raised a hand. 

“lemme tell this part pap.” Sans shifted me over so I stayed on his lap but was able to look him in the eyes. 

“he had planned to make my soul adapt to losing HP by causing the same amount of damage to it every day until it increased. but his reasoning was flawed. to him, HP was just a number. he thought of HP as ‘health points’ when really HP stood for HoPe”

I started realizing why the experiment wasn’t working and my eyes widened.

“You started losing HP the day that he…. You were losing hope of ever getting out… You were like me…. Wha-What happened that day?”

Sans sighed and rubbed his hand down his face.

“let’s just say aster won’t be bothering anyone ever again… pap made sure of that….”

I was silent for a moment as I took it all in. 

“P-papyrus?”

The skeleton in question looked my way nervously. I paused slightly before speaking again.

“C-can you teach me how to fight?”

Sans stopped rubbing my arm and gripped it in a painful way.

“why…. do you wanna learn?”

I turned away from Sans slightly embarrassed.

“I-I wanna learn how to protect you guys…. And myself.”

Sans went back to rubbing my arm slowly. 

“you don’t have to do that. we are capable of taking care of ourselves.”

I frowned a bit and crossed my arms.

“I don’t care how good you guys are at fighting. You never know when something could happen! I wanna be able to protect the people who are trying to protect me.”

Sans smiled. 

“I shall take this opportunity to bond with you, human. It was a wise decision to choose The Terrible Papyrus as your mentor. For I have the best fighting experience in all of the Underground!

“is that why you can never beat undyne?”

Papyrus stood up. 

“I LET UNDYNE WIN TO BOOST HER CONFIDENCE IN HERSELF.”

“sure you are.”

“LIKE YOU CAN DO ANY BETTER.”

“i could beat her with my eyes closed. in fact, i’ll close my eyes now.”

He set his chin on the top of my head and fell asleep.

“SANS THAT ISN’T FIGHTING. YOU ARE ASLEEP.”

“i just don’t wanna get in trouble for resisting a rest.”

“NYEEEEEEEEEHH SANS YOU IDIOT. IM GOING OUT. TALK TO ME WHEN YOU’RE DONE BEING A COMPLETE BAFOON.”

And with that Papyrus walked out the house and slammed the door. Leaving me and Sans chuckling. 

“There is one thing I don’t understand though, Sans…”

“hmm?”

“Why am I sitting on your lap?”

I could feel the head on mine getting warmer. Instantly I felt tired. 

“w-well kiddo-”

“Imma not a kid…” I mumbled trying to stay awake. 

“i-i had just teleported in and just happened to be- hey! are you falling asleep on me!”

“No… no… I’m just resting my eyes a bit… you should… you should do the same…”

I heard him chuckle and we slowly backed down until we were laying on the floor.

“Goodnight…” I said sleepily

“it’s only two o’clock…”

“Goodnight Sans…”

“alright kid…. good night….”

And we were both out like a light.

  
  


Of course, only in this house, you wake up covered in dog residue and Sans being chased twenty dogs and trying to attack them all.

 

“W-what is happening?

Sans ran towards me and teleported us both on top of the kitchen table.

“distract them while i call for pap!”

“What? With what?”

He created a bone and threw it at me.

“use that!” he said and pulled out his phone and dialed Papyrus on speakerphone. While I took out my phone to record the dogs and send a video to Undyne. 

“hello?”

“HEY, WHAT’S UP?” Papyrus came through the phone like he was right in front of me. 

“can you come home, i need you”

“I CAN’T I’M BUYING CLOTHES.”

“alright well hurry up and get over here.”

“I CAN’T FIND THEM.”

“what do you mean you can’t find them?”

I turned the phone towards Sans realizing that he was going to be a lot more entertaining than the dogs. 

“I CAN’T FIND THEM THERE’S ONLY SOUP.”

“then get out of the soup aisle then!”

“ALRIGHT, YOU DON’T HAVE  TO SHOUT AT ME…. THERE’S JUST MORE SOUP”

“go to the next aisle!”

“THERE’S STILL SOUP”

“where are you right now!”

“I’M AT SOUP.”

“what do you mean you’re at soup?!”

“I MEAN I’M AT SOUP”

“what store are you in!?”

“I’M IN THE SOUP STORE.”

“why are you buying clothes at the soup store!?”

“FUCK YOU!”

Sans hung up the phone and turned towards me, red eyelights zeroing in on my phone. “are you fuckin’ recording this?!” I stifle a chuckle as the chaos of dogs around us makes it all the more hilarious.

“Pfft- I-I just thought it’d be funny... H-Hehe..” My fingers press the stop recording button and you giggle.

“D-Don’t worry, I’m done- It stopped recording-” I was cut off as Sans summoned a bone attack to fight the dogs behind me. I yelped when a dog bumped the table, making me drop my phone. Thankfully though, I had a case on it so it wasn’t cracked. I kneeled down and picked it up, debating on whether or not my plan should be played out.

Yeah, it should totally be done.

I pressed the button that had access to my photos and videos, snorting at the position Sans was in, practically on the counters and slapping the dogs with his red magic bone projectiles.

My fingers trembled in my laughing fit and I was barely able to hit the ‘message’ button. Sans looks at me in confusion before getting back to trying to kill the canines that were gnawing at his bones. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I typed a quick message and almost passed out from the restriction of oxygen because of my hysterical laughter.

I start to giggle madly as I type the last character and hit send. "Looks like.. Pfft- You r-really wanna bone a dog."

**{Message to All Contacts, Video Attached;}**

‘I think Sans is a furry, he seems like he's enjoying boning these dogs?’

I held my stomach, lungs hurting from hilariousness of it all.

Sans looks at me like I’m crazy, jumping onto the table and flinging attacks all around, trying to hit at least one of those demons. He picks up my phone and sees that I sent a video. I quickly grab it back and hold it close to my chest. In a probably futile effort to protect my glorious video.

“what the fUCK?!”

I lost it.

“HAHAHA-”

“you seriously sent this to fucking EVERYONE-”

“OH, MY GOAHAHAH-”

Sans gave me a death stare that I assume was supposed to be intimidating but ended up hilarious since he had two dogs hanging off his arms.

“delete it.” 

“B-but it’s so funny though! Pfft-” My eyes scrunched up with my amused grin. Sans’ eyelight flashed a bright red and his finger tilted upward, as much as it could because of the canines dangling from his appendages. And suddenly, my phone wasn’t in my hands anymore. 

“Wha-”

“heh, got ya.” Sans dangled my phone in front of me, tauntingly hovering over the edit & delete button.

“W-wait! Please- that video is perfect don’t delete such a work of art!”

I suddenly remember that if he does delete it, Undyne probably already posted it online and smirk.

“Actually, sure, go ahead. Delete it.” I say and crowd dive into the pile of dogs as they carry me out the door. 

“wait! where are you goin?” 

“Neverland!” I scream and run through the small forest that separated our house and Undyne’s. I heard a sound behind me so I turned back to look at Sans behind me and turn back only to run head first into a tree.

“oh geez- kitten you aight?”

I open my eyes to see Sans standing above me with a worried expression on his face and could only manage a smile before passing out.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


I wake up to the sound of choking noises and look over and holy fuck Undyne is trying to kill the skeleton who saved me whom i maybe have a crush on but the authors haven’t established that fully yet maybe? And then Undyne calls him a piece of shit. 

“No please undyne-sama don't kill my skeleton not-boyfriend!” she blinks at me and takes a long look at Sans, slowly dropping him to the ground.

“Did you give her drugs?”

“FUCK NO-” Sans starts to defend himself, face flushing a bright crimson, but he was interrupted by a loud gruff voice.

“BROTHER ARE YOU SELLING DRUGS TO THE HUMAN!? FOR FUCKS SAKE!!” T’was Papyru the royal not-guard-kind-of-person-i-made-up-with-but-maybe-?.

“PAPYRUUUUUU~!”

I glomped the tall intimidating skeleton.

He doesn’t know how to respond.

I laugh hysterically and grasp at the floating dogs above my head.

“Pretty doggies!”

Everyone just looks at me like I’m insane as I giggle.

“My child… I think you have an injury…”

“I’m fiiiiiinnneeeee Tori Dori. My favorite goat ma’amma Jamma”

Tori just sighs and holds back a soft chuckle.

“Come here, let me heal you. You might have hit your head a bit too hard…”

She comes over and I let go of Paypal the Credit Card and flop onto Tutorial’s lap.

“Heheheeeeee~”

There are so many of her faces… haahaa that's funnyyy-

I suddenly get an idea and turn towards Sans with a big smile on my face.

“SKELEBELLY!” I scream and plant a kiss right on his teeth,”

He lights up like a Christmas tree and I suddenly feel a furry hand on my face and I lose consciousness again.

 

I woke up again with a slight headache and a blanket covering me. I hear a noise and realize I’m surrounded by a clusterfuck of sleeping monsters.

“What the fuck.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cyanide  
> "HEYOOOOOO SO I'VE BEEN ON AN EXTENDED VACA WITH EDGE AND RED AND THEY BOTH PROPOSED TO ME! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? They didn't even want a ceremony they just signed the marriage papers! Slipping them with hotel paper was Genius!"  
> "we can't convince her to sign the divorce papers, fuckin psycho"  
> "BROTHER MAKE HER SIGN THEM"
> 
> Lea  
> HELLO IT'S US YA BOIS BROSKI'S AND SHIZ WE BEEN TACKLED WITH LIFE AND IT PUNCHED US IN THE TIT  
> SORRY- WE BACK THO
> 
> Ulti  
> I can't believe I'm fucking dead


End file.
